Resolved

I've stated before that I don't usually make New Year's resolutions, since I prefer to do them on my birthday. This year, I'm changing it up a little bit.

I still have my birthday resolutions, but this year I'm adding one to begin on the new year.

Right now, I'm at the heaviest weight I've eve been. I feel fatigued a lot of the time, and I generally just don't feel good about myself. My clothes no longer fit, and I get winded every time I have to go up a flight of stairs. 

I've had a lot of people look at me and say "oh, you're not fat" or "you don't need to lose weight!". That's a really nice sentiment, and I'm grateful that people aren't flat out telling me I'm disgusting or anything like that, but it isn't really what I need to hear. 

I'll be brave for a second: at 4 ft 11 inches tall, I weigh 142 pounds. That puts my BMI at 28.7. Keep in mind that the obese category begins at 29.9 - less than ten pounds away in my case. I'm aware that the BMI is not a definitive measurement, or even completely accurate when taking muscle mass into account - but it is a good place to start. Trust me, I have barely any muscle mass to begin with, and I have a very small frame - any extra weight is guaranteed to be fat and not good for my health.

Not to mention, I have no chance of my insurance covering a surgery that I would like very much to have until I am within a "normal" BMI range. I need to lose approximately 40 lbs before I will be in that range.

I've found that every time I've tried to lose weight in the past, I get to a certain point and forget that I have no self control. I allow myself "treats", and then before I know it, I've gained everything back, and then some. This is going to be a very difficult habit for me to break. I need to be very aware of what I am putting into my body without resorting to my past habit of disordered eating. I need to get my body back into the habit of physical exercise. These are no small feats.

Instead of telling me that I'm beautiful as I am, or that I don't look that big, or that I don't need to "diet", please offer encouragement. Know that I am breaking twenty-four years of bad habits, and that it is going to take an astonishing amount of work on my part. Don't tempt me with fried, sugary, or fatty foods. I have no control when it comes to those and if I'm offered something - especially when I'm afraid I'll seem rude in saying no - I will eat it, and I will feel bad about it later. Please don't try to goad me into eating bagels or fast food. I'm very bad at saying no to myself or to others when it comes to food. I do much better when foods I shouldn't eat simply aren't around.

I think that with the support of those around me, I can do this. I can make a huge, positive change in my life. I have no illusions of this being easy, but I do hope that I can replace some bad habits with some good ones.

~Megan

What Do Vegans Eat?

The friends I am staying with in Ohio are vegan. I've been vegetarian in the past, and I guess I'm pescetarian now (meaning I eat seafood but no chicken, beef, or pork). I've been trying to be as plant-based and animal-free as possible, though I have had my challenges.

The one thing people always get confused on is what vegans can eat. Since the lifestyle (and diet especially) is considered a list of "can't eat" foods, most people think that in order to be vegan, you have to eat nothing but salads and pasta.

That is so far from the truth.

So far this weekend I have eaten:

Cereal

Chocolate hazelnut cake

Gyros complete with tatziki (seitan and soy)

Golden nuggets (they're like chicken nuggets but better)

A burger

Pancakes with sausage and bacon (made from tempeh)

Oatmeal cookie sandwiches with vanilla frosting

Grilled cheese sandwhiches

French fries with ranch dressing

Yes, products above like the burger, sausage, and bacon lack the exact taste and texture of meat. That doesn't mean they're not a very close approximation, though. The sausage was pretty dead on - the only giveaway was that it isn't as fatty and greasy as animal meat. 

When I eat a lot of vegan food, I get full to a satisfying level - not so full I feel sick or like I need to take a nap, just content.

Not only do I get to feel good after I eat because I don't feel sick, but I also have the satisfaction that no living creatures (well, besides plants) were tortured, abused, and killed for my meal. There really is something to that. 

If you can, I would recommend making some vegan choices. For your health, animals, the Earth, or simply for the fact that vegan food is delicious. You choose, any way, you win

~Megan

Oh-Hi-Oh

Get it, Ohio?

I slay myself.

But in all seriousness, I'm in Ohio visiting my best friend this weekend! It took around 8 hours to get here, but I always love coming. 

Especially since there was an ice storm at home while it was 55 degrees here. It's raining today, but there's a snowstorm happening in Wisconsin. I have no room to complain about the rain.

Especially when I can spend the day with my best friend watching Gossip Girl and making cupcakes. It's weekends like this that I really wish I lived closer. I'm considering applying to Ohio State for grad school. Not only is it a great school, but it has the added benefit of being basically right next to her.

As much as I love my friends and family back home, there really is something to be said for spending time with someone who has known you for the last ten years, good and bad.

~Megan

Plans A Through D

Like any college senior, I've been thinking about the future a lot lately.

You know, thinking, crying, drinking, laying in the dark under the covers wishing to be a freshman again. The usual coping methods.

But because I like to think that I'm proactive, I have devised a few plans just in case.

Plan A:
I'm applying to the Human Skeletal Biology MA program at NYU. The chances of me getting in are probably slim, but the application isn't due until March. Fingers crossed that I can get some good references by then. If I get in, I'll start next fall.

Plan B:
 Take one more semester at UWM (next fall) to build relationships/experience and apply for graduate school, starting fall 2015. So far my list includes: NYU, Harvard, Berkley, UCLA, Northwestern, University of Washington, University of Hawaii, and UWM. Fingers crossed I get into any of them.

Plan C:
Sort of an extension of plan B, in that it involves me getting into a program at UWM, which is my safety school. Since I'm already familiar with the faculty, I'm really hoping that I'll get in at least here. Bonus: I would get to stay an active sister of my sorority through graduate school!

Plan D:
I get in nowhere. I join the real world and get a job. I have no idea what I want to do besides grad school, so this one is tricky. I'd be happy making money in anything, but something to do with my field would be nice (though I have no idea what). This is the most frightening plan.

Plan E:
Okay, so this is like a fantasy plan. I get in nowhere. I decide that knowledge cannot be limited and I go back to school for a post bachelor's second degree. Maybe something practical, like a STEM field. Or history, kinesiology, religious studies. Maybe a certificate in death investigation. I'd love to keep going to school - partly because I love to learn and partly because I'm afraid of ending up in a job that I don't really want simply because I settled for one that has nothing to do with my real passions.

Okay, now that I'm terrified all over again, I'm going to go hide under some covers.

~Megan

Growing Pains Playlist

I feel like I've been coming out of a cocoon lately. It's an odd thing to describe, but I feel like my eyes are being opened to a lot that I hadn't previously seen. I'm gaining self-confidence by the bucketful, be that good or bad, and I'm starting to believe in the power of my own potential.

But like anything else, there are growing pains. Some mistakes just have to be made. Unfortunately for me, I'm the kind of person that never takes someone's word for it when they say that the stove is hot. I've got to burn myself first.

I also tend to be programmed to take the most difficult path, which is especially interesting considering I also tend to live live in extremes.

I'm always too hot or too cold. Bored or overwhelmed. Exhausted or full of energy. Shy or entirely too extroverted.

See the problem?

So while I'm enjoying all of these new life experiences, you can imagine what those growing pains look like. 

Nothing soothes the soul quite like music though, and I've been listening to one particular Pandora station for days. I'm so into it that I pulled a few tracks out and made myself a playlist. You know, so that I can continue to listen to things on repeat.

1. Kate Earl - You Can't Treat Me That Way

2. Massive Attack - Paradise Circus

3. - Massive Attack - Angel

4. Massive Attack - Teardrop

5. Moby - Porcelain

6. Kate Earl - Golden Street

7. Portishead - Glory Box

8. Nero - Promises

Of course, there are more songs that I've been really into lately and have on repeat, but these are all the same kind of chill vibe that's been keeping me grounded. I'm also realizing how much I love Massive Attack (obviously). 

So excuse me while I close my eyes, turn up the volume, and sing my heart out.

~Megan

Time Travel

I think I've finally found a way to make time go faster:

Become so busy you can't keep track of what day it is, what time it is, or if you've eaten yet.

It's practically a science. I'm going to be rich!

Ha.

But in all seriousness, how is it already the middle of October?! I haven't even started my Halloween costume, and midterms are next week. 

Truthfully though, I love when my life is this busy. I have a sense of purpose and impending doom. It doesn't sound like it, but that's actually my perfect recipe for a productive self. I know it's cliche, but I really do work best under pressure and let me tell you, I'm feeling it.

My classes are really picking up. Like I said, midterms are next week and I'm definitely not ready for them. I know I always say that, but this time I really mean it. I've been super distracted lately but stupid things and now I think I can focus properly.

Work is work, though I'm finally getting a handle on all of my responsibilities. The paperwork has taken forever for me to get the hang of. But I'm getting there!

I also decided to pledge a sorority, so I'm crazy busy with all of that. I really love it though, and since this is something I've always wanted to do for myself, I'm getting immense satisfaction from the process. Plus I'm getting to meet so many amazing women!

I'm still studying for the GRE, and compiling graduate school applications. I'm terrified of asking my professors for letters of recommendation, since I'm not super close with any of them and I haven't done any undergraduate research yet. My backup plan is to complete a second major if I don't get into any graduate schools by this year's deadline. I'll admit, I'll be crushed if that happens, but having a plan be is always good, right?

Oh, and the best part about this week? My best friend is in town! She moved to Ohio after college (which was in Iowa), and though we talk almost every day, I miss her like crazy. She's basically my other half, and I'm pretty sure if I didn't have her I'd actually go crazy.

I hope everyone is having a great week/month/semester!

~Megan

Anthropology: A Primer

In response to a comment: I actually get asked this question a lot. What is anthropology? What do you do with a degree in anthropology? Well friends, pull up a blanket, get cozy, and here goes nothing.

Anthropology comes from Anthrop, Greek for man, and -ology, meaning the study of. 

The study of man.

There are four (and a half) different fields in anthropology.

The first is Physical/Biological Anthropology. This is the study of how humans evolved and how we vary as a species. The focus of this field is primarily bones, whether chimpanzee or human. Forensic Anthropology (think Bones) comes from this field. (This is likely what I want to do when I grow up).

The next is Linguistic Anthropology. This is more than just linguistics, or the study of language. When looking at language from an anthropological point of view, we study the social context of language moreso than the specific semantics or grammar of a given language. Basically, the how, when, and why languages have developed and evolved.

Third, we have Archaeology. Everyone knows this one, thanks to Indiana Jones. The process of finding artifacts and remains, studying them to determine how a population lived and died, and cataloging them to preserve their history. To be completely honest, this is my least favorite field. At the beginning of this semester, I had hopes of joining a dig in Ireland or somesuch, and now after 5 weeks of an intro-level course, I'm pretty convinced I'd hate it.

Finally, we have Cultural Anthropology. This is probably what most people think of when I say that I study anthropology. Here we have the study of people and cultures. This ranges from religious studies, to ethnography (a study of a particular population), to the understanding of how today's cultures interact with one another. I happen to have a  lot of credit hours devoted to this field, simply because I find the material interesting. However, it is a bit of a soft science (meaning it involves a good deal of conjecture and a good deal of bias on the part of the scientist), and at present I'm interested in absolutes.

The half-field I mentioned is Museum Studies, which involves learning how to curate collections for museums, preserve and catalog artifacts, authenticate artifacts, and create exhibits for the general public to enjoy. This is kind of my backup plan, should I end up also disliking physical anthropology.

As for the "what are you going to do with a degree in that? question.

There are a couple answers. First, I could work in a field that requires a bachelor's degree as minimum education. That would be better than what I was doing before, and I wouldn't complain. I would happily do secretarial work with my degree as long as I had a job.

Second, there's graduate school. I'm taking the GRE (Graduate Records Exam) next month, which basically determines which, if any, graduate school I can attend. Fingers crossed, because that's my plan A.

Anthropology is one of those things that, in order to work strictly in my field, requires a doctorate. I'd love a doctorate. It's been my dream since I was little to have a PhD. (I know, dream big right?) It is also one of those fields that can be creatively parlayed into other things, such as data analysis or corporate research. You know, if I ever wanted to do something like that. 

And now, you know.

~Megan

The Writer Who Didn't Write

Confession: While I fancy myself a writer, I'm finding it harder and harder to actually write anything.

Okay, sure I write plenty of papers and things for my courses, but that doesn't count to me as actual writing. I mean the creative, stay up until 4 am because you can't get the dialogue onto the page fast enough, falling in love with your characters kind of writing.

I'm proud to say that last night I finally got something down on a page.

Granted, I have no idea if this story has a plot, what the plot is, why the characters are doing what they're doing and if I even like them. But it's at least writing.

Maybe this is like riding a bike for the first time in years. Yes, you can still do it. No, it isn't glamorous and you'll probably fall off, pull a muscle, or steer into something. The point is  you got back on the bicycle and you're trying.

Now I just need to resist the urge to flat out delete my work. I told a friend once that I didn't have any of my old writing because I got frustrated and deleted it all - he yelled at me for a good five minutes. He even offered to set up an email address for me to send everything to if I feel like hitting the delete button, just in case I wanted to look at it again in the future. In writing, it's important to be able to examine past work, and sometimes you find plots and characters that are worth revisiting now that you're a little older, wiser, and have a different perspective.

Besides, how can I really call myself any kind of writer if I never actually write anything except term papers and blog entries? Time to stretch my imagination a little. 

~Megan

GREat

I just registered for the GRE.

To say that I'm terrified is probably an understatement. The score I receive on that one test determines if I go to graduate school, and which school I go to. Basically, the rest of my college career hinges on the score from this one standardized test.

Sure, I can retake it, but I would really like to do well the first time around. Your first score doesn't disappear, and given my perfectionism, it'll bother me if I have two scores.

Not to mention its an expensive test. Yikes.

Anyways, my life is pretty much going to look like this for the next month:

Stay tuned.

~Megan

Woosh

That's the sound of all my time flying right past me.

Between my job (which I am still loving) and this mountain of homework, I haven't really had time for much of a social life lately. Not that I'm complaining (much).

It just makes me all the more grateful for the people I do get to share my time with and the things we get to do. Sitting out on the plaza or grabbing lunch with Tony, making plans for late dinner with Elsa, getting to know all of my co-mentors, and spending more time with Elyssa are all valuable ways for me to spend my time.

While I don't have much else to say, I do want to thank everyone that's keeping me sane this semester. It's going to be rough, but worth it.

~Megan

Well, Hello Stranger

The stranger is me.

I was reminded recently that I do, in fact have a blog here, and that it's annoying that I don't update it.

Sorry!

I started the fall semester a week or so ago, and before that...I have no excuses.

But I started the fall semester! 18 credits, my heaviest course load yet. I'm taking almost all Anthropology courses and one math class. Unfortunately, they do make you take math, and they don't just let it slide since you're so close to graduation. Darn.

I'm also in full mentoring swing in the Student Success Center on campus. I'm assigned to mostly returning adult students, and so far I've met some really cool people! I'm super excited to be working with this demographic, because I feel like I understand where they're coming from (says the 24 year old college senior).

My co-mentors are really awesome people as well. I'm feeling really lucky to be part of such a high achieving group, never mind having such a great leadership position. 

I have a feeling that fall is going to fly by so fast. I mean, I don't want it to, but I'm anticipating that I'll be kept really busy with all of this new responsibility.

I do get to go to a leadership retreat at a camp this weekend though! I've never gone to a day camp before, so it's a new experience for me in more ways than one. I'm really looking forward to it, even if I do have to stock up on bug spray.

That's my life in a nutshell recently, but I'll do my level best to update this blog more often and with more interesting stories.

~Megan

Farm Fresh

Today was pretty much the best.

Andrew and I went to a farmer's market nearby. Being August, just about everything is in season and crazy delicious and fresh. Fresh, as in corn that was picked this morning. 

I really can't wait to get cooking with some of the stuff I got:

•   Four sweet onions. These things are huge. Man it's gonna be good.
• Fresh green bell peppers. 
• Six ears of corn picked this morning.
• 18 fresh eggs (9 of which I will be bartering for some tahini in the very near future).
• A thyme plant, which hopefully will become part of a nice little herb garden outside my door.
• Red potatoes, which were mashed with pureed edamame to go with dinner.
• Pork chops (for the husband, naturally), locally raised.

Because we were on a roll, we stopped by the Public Market to get some salmon for myself for dinner, courtesy of the St. Paul Fish Market. This place has seriously every kind of fish, including Blue Marlin. It's all flown in daily and the quality is probably the best in the city.

The evening was then rounded out with a giant dinner with friends, a few glasses of wine, and Dr Who (which coincidentally blew my mind).

And to think, it's only Saturday!

~Megan

Lifestyle Shock

It's been a few weeks since I left my job, and it'll be a few weeks until my new job starts. This is a huge anomaly for me. I've been working since I was 16 and I've never been unemployed. This is the first time I've allowed myself to live on basically no income.

You can imagine I've had a bit of a shock.

For example, I did a really stupid thing and miscalculated the total amount of my last paycheck from my job. By a lot. So much so, that I overspent my financial aid on I-don't-even-know-what, and found myself in a very interesting financial position.

See, I'm just not used to not having a disposable income. It may not have always been much, but I've always had one. I've always been able to buy my morning chai without feeling too much guilt. I've amassed a decent collection of shoes as well, thanks to my ability to drop some cash every couple weeks on footwear.

So this is definitely weird for me.

But, I like a challenge. From here on out it would seem I need to actually stick to a budget and exercise some common sense when it comes to spending.

Or I could just find that money tree everyone keeps talking about...

~Megan

Making Money in College

You know, without taking your clothes of or anything of the like. 

(Not that I have anything against sex work whatsoever. Work is work. Read about it)

Anyways.

I'm a poor student now, after leaving my full time bank job to finish out my senior year.

Soon, I'll be a Campus Ambassador in our Student Success Office, mentoring incoming transfer students. I'm super excited for the opportunity, not only to make money, but to gain skills, make friends, and generally be more involved on campus. 

In the meantime, however, I'm a little uh...cash poor.

So I opened my eyes.

There are a lot of opportunities to make money through a university. There are various studies being done all the time. Some pay a lot, some pay a little. But for just a few hours of your time, even a small amount is pretty good.

For example, there's a couple fliers for an alcohol and energy drink usage survey. It's an hour long survey and pays $20. There's another (super confidential) brain imaging study for both users and non-users of marijuana. It takes 8 hours over 5 sessions, involves things like getting an MRI, measuring physical and mental fitness levels, and completing thinking puzzles. It pays up to $340 and you get a souvenir print of your brain MRI.

Some studies involve things like behavioral issues such as test taking anxiety or things like smoking cigarettes. 

And, bonus, it's all for science! Science is pretty great.

So next time you're wandering around campus feeling the pain of an empty wallet, take a look, there might be an opportunity for a bit of cash hanging right on the wall.

~Megan

Good Night, Milwaukee

I've been dreaming of living in NYC since I was probably 15.

But you know the saying "Be happy with what you have". And let me tell you, Milwaukee is actually pretty great.

We have:

One of the best Zoos in the country.

One of the largest natural history museums in the country.

Some of the lowest prices on alcohol.

A vibrant arts and music culture.

And this:

A view of the Milwaukee Art Museum, which not only houses many fine pieces of artwork, also ranks high on the list of world's sexiest buildings. The Santiago Calatrava Brise Soliel is famous, and I'm proud to have it right in my city. (This was taken on my walk back from the world's largest music festival, held every year, Summerfest!)

I mean, New York City is great and all...but can they say that is has the largest four-faced clock tower in the western hemisphere? Yes, it is larger than Big Ben, which is the largest chiming four-faced clock tower in the world. Take that, London!

Not to mention plenty of beer, cheese, and sausage to go around. 

So I suppose for the time being, Milwaukee is a pretty cool place to call home.

~Megan

Study, study, study

I know I was excited to take summer classes and really dive into my coursework but wow. I guess I didn't stop to think and realize that three upper-level courses at once over the course of a month would be this intense. This coming week, I have:

1 quiz - sociology of sport

1 test - ancient Egyptian mythology

1 presentation - sociology of sport

2 discussion/response posts - culture of online gaming

1 response paper - culture of online gaming

1 gaming journal entry - culture of online gaming

and finally...

9 hours minimum clocked in an online game or virtual world - You get three guesses as to which class that's for.

Excuse me while I go live in the library for a week. Hey, at least the library has A/C.

~Megan

Happy 4th of July!

I hope everyone had a great time today!

I spent the day at my grandmother's house for an impromptu barbeque. It was great, because it gave me a chance to use up the rhubarb and strawberries I had from my trip to the farmer's market last week, to make these guys:

Some Phyllo dough, a recipe for pie filling, and a few blueberries later and I had a very patriotic (and tasty!) dessert.

Most of the afternoon was spent outside, enjoying the weather (which was about 10 degrees warmer at my grandma's house ) and taking little trips down memory lane.

My grandma and I were walking in the yard, and she said "Remember when you and your cousins would play "indians" and you would mash up grass and berries to serve to us? Bark was your specialty!" Apparently, I was all about the food even back then.

We also discovered that her cherry tree was giving fruit! My favorite cherries (and the only ones I'll eat) are the really tart ones, which happen to grow on that tree. You'd better believe I left with plenty:

I think another tart is in order. These little cherries are just too perfect. That is, if they last long enough for me to bake with, I can't stop eating them!

Well, the fireworks just ended so I should probably get some homework done. I hope everyone enjoyed our midweek holiday!

~Megan

Rule Number One

Every. Day.

Otherwise this is what will happen:

Yesterday, I decided to wear leggings as pants. Not even with a tunic length-top. I was wearing a t-shirt and ballet flats. Very obviously a leggings-as-pants situation. Oh, and a boyfriend cardigan. Needless to say, I was feeling very lazy (and having a "my leggings are kind of the only things that fit right now" Regina George day). I went to class. Not a big deal - my campus is a toss up between well dressed and not so much.

Of course, as I'm stuffing my face with potstickers in the cafe, I see a girl I went to high school with (we aren't friends). We ignored one another but I still felt that twinge of "oh good, of course on the day I look like a mess".

It gets better.

Tuesday nights are my standing appointment at a wine bar downtown. On a nice street downtown, with well-dressed clientele. However, I decided to throw caution to the wind and go right from class to the bar. It usually ends up being just the wine director (a good friend of mine) and I, so I wasn't really worried. And for the most part, it was just the two of us. Fast forward to the end of the night: I'm chatting with my friend, about the new store opening next door. I look into the window to see what they're selling. The lights go on and a very nice looking, well-dressed man opens the door and says "Hey, I saw you looking in the window, why don't you come in and see what the store is like? We aren't open yet but come on in." Okay, of course it turns out to be a high-end women's clothing and accessories store. Of course.

Fast forward about 15 minutes. My husband and his friend show up to pick me up, since I'd taken the bus down there and it was late by this point. Turns out, Andrew's friend C knows the very nice looking man - who runs a local fashion magazine and is pretty much "the" fashion guy in Milwaukee. Of course, on the day I'm wearing leggings-as-pants.

Though it turned out that the guy was trying to pick me up, telling C he was "just trying to pick up this beautiful girl" when the guys showed up (which turned into a contract for C's PR business! Score!). He wasn't too thrilled to see my husband, but I had the ego stroke of a lifetime (and apparently I'm losing the ability to tell when I'm being flirted with - though he was very, very smooth about it. He gave me his phone number and Andrew laughed that I didn't immediately realize what was going on. What? He had a good reason - he wanted to show me the store when the apparel side was done and get my opinion! Okay, that still sounds like flirting now that I type it out. Oops.)

Even though this story turned out with a very happy ending, imagine how much nicer it would have been had I decided to dress somewhat nicely? Even jeans instead of leggings. Or black pants! Something with a zipper or button!

I've learned my lesson.

(Though at the moment, I'm wishing it was acceptable for me to go to the CVS in my pajamas...though I've had a few run-ins there too. Ah, well.)

~Megan

Procrastination

I may or may not have spent my first day off taking a really long nap. Okay, I admit it. I totally did, it was great.

Tomorrow though, I don't have class until 5:30, and only one assignment to do before that, so I have really no excuse not to finish (completely) at least one room in my apartment. I'm probably going to start with the bedroom, and the little office connected to it. I'm missing a textbook that needs to be returned to Amazon by the 6th. Hello, monetary motivation.

What I'm really excited for is cleaning out my dresser, putting things that I am very unlikely to wear on campus into boxes, and putting them away in my closet, which I will also organize. Like the entire drawer I have for pencil skirts. Not that I dislike pencils skirts, actually the opposite is true, I just don't see myself in a pencil skirt and heels studying in the library.

Instead, I'm going to make a trip up to the mall to find a new pair of jeans or two, maybe a couple of cute tops for the fall, and hope my shipment from Target comes in with all of the shoes I've ordered.

Oddly enough I chose about three pairs of flats. I don't normally wear flats, ever, but heels on my campus is kind of an unheard of thing. It feels weird. Plus, I'm trying to walk to campus as much as possible, and a mile each way in four inch heels is easier said than done (and it isn't even easy to say!).

So, project self-improvement begins...tomorrow!

~Megan

The Last Day

Today is my last day at work - Woohoo!

Although the day is definitely crawling. And I keep forgetting that I'm not just going on vacation. I almost asked a coworker to bring something to work for me this week...and then stopped when I realized, wait, I won't be here this week, or next week, or the week after, etc.

As busy as I am with school, I'm a little curious as to what, exactly, I'm going to do with my time. I'm thinking I'm going to take this month of solid unemployment (my student job starts in August) as a month of self-improvement. I want to:

• Read more books. I even started a book club! I can't wait for the first book to get here from Amazon. I'm so excited I might just buy the kindle version. Ahh!
• Drink more tea. I just love how fancy I feel with my cup and saucer.
• Actually get into shape. Without work weighing me down and exhausting me, I have no excuses about skipping workouts and eating poorly (no cafeteria right down the hall!).
• Whip my apartment into shape. Two months later it still looks like we just moved in. Unacceptable. But now that I have vast swaths of free time I have, again, no excuses.

I also want to try my hand at canning. Of course, I'm going to start off with tomatoes, but I'd also like to branch into sauces. I know Andrew is really excited for me to experiment with the French mother sauces. The man loves a good demi glace.

~Megan

Feeling French

Sunday afternoons scream relaxation.

Today, I had a small combination of craving and inspiration - I really wanted some smoked salmon. (Okay, what I really really wanted was some smoked duck breast, but it being Sunday, I couldn't get any).

So I headed on down to Whole Foods and made myself a nice little French inspired lunch:

Smoked salmon, Swiss cheese, a baguette and some white wine left from last night.

Not only did I have a filling lunch, I got to feel a little fancy on a Sunday afternoon. What's your favorite Sunday activity?

~Megan

Book Review - Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters

Okay, I admit I'm not 100% finished with this book. But I can't put it down or get it out of my head.

I identify so much with the kinds of girls Courtney Martin describes. The girl who is bothered by lopsided circles in her class notes, the girls that were told "you're special" all through life and hate themselves when they can't pick up a new skill immediately. Those of us that really did hear "you can do anything" and interpreted "you have to be everything".

Martin's writing is very relatable - its as if your best friend is holding up a mirror and revealing a very secret part of your life.

I have struggled with disordered eating since I was a teenager. I have interpreted this struggle as my means of control when I feel as though nothing is going right in life. It is comforting to know that I am not alone - my situation is not unique. I'm not the only girl that was placed in the gifted programs, the accelerated programs, and yet struggled with one subject, becoming frustrated to the point of forgoing food.

I highly recommend this book. Through it, I am understanding more about myself and my interpretation of the world.

~Megan

Bang!

I have this sort of love/hate relationship with my hair.

Whenever it's long, I want it to be short. Whenever it's short, I want long, flowing locks. Essentially, the grass is always greener with the other hairstyle.

Right now, I've got bangs. I think they frame my face nicely, especially when swept to one side. I'm itching to grow them out, though. Bangs require a lot of upkeep (trims, etc) and they tend to get dirty faster than the rest of my hair (thanks, forehead). Speaking of forehead, whenever I have bangs, I basically can't have clear skin on my forhead (but then the bangs cover it up so is that a wash?).

It's just that the growing out process is so long and in some stages, super awkward.

And I guarantee that once I have my bangs all grown out, it won't take me longer than a month to think "I miss my bangs".

I think I'm just going to have to start wearing wigs or something.

Does anyone else have this kind of dilemma? Maybe it's just me.

~Megan

So It Begins

Today was my first day of the intense end of my summer coursework.

I (in all my infinite wisdom) decided to take three upper-level courses over the space of a month. Remind me in the future: this is not the best idea. I'm feeling more confident about my decision to leave work early, because after just one day I have:

80 pages of material to read, understand, and comment on by Wednesday at 10 pm.

A response paper to write by Sunday at midnight

A ten page research paper due in a month

Oh, and I haven't even started the third, month-and-a-half long class yet.

Needless to say, today hasn't really been my day.

Especially since I went to the bookstore to get the text for my sociology course, only to find out they'd sold out (for some reason the university bookstore always under-orders texts). Then, the lecture notes I need for tomorrow's course "haven't been requested yet" even though I can see that they're required on the website. Oh, and to top it all off, they were out of GRE study guides.

That has to be the most fruitless expedition to a bookstore I've ever undertaken.

Well, having my husband say "Where are you? I'm near the fetal pigs!" was pretty good.

Wish me luck for the rest of this week, I'm going to need it!

~Megan

Dad's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there!

Today we're celebrating my father-in-law with something we like to call "Dad Food Fest".

Basically, each of us makes one of his favorite foods and we have a silly little 'competition' to see who made the best dish.

It's my humble opinion that as the chief dessert maker, my famous key lime pie wins every year.

My sister-in-law April is the absolute master of shrimp, though. Andrew is the steak king. Eric makes deviled eggs like nobody's business. And Steve...Steve hands dad the beer. I mean, we all  have our skills.

I'm outdoing myself this year. Home made whipped cream for atop the pie. I know.

(I was going to post pictures but I ended up eating way too much and falling asleep. Whoops.)

~Megan

Leap of Faith

I'm getting ready to take a pretty giant leap of faith.

Monday morning, I'm handing in my two weeks notice and jumping into near-unemployment.

I'm both terrified and excited.

On the one hand, my classes are very demanding and need to be my priority. I'll have lots of time to study, and less to stress about on top of school. I've never been just a college student, so this is a new world to me - and so far, I like it. It's crazy to me that I'm excited about not having to take off of work to go to office hours or study in the library. I can just do it. Man.

On the other hand, its been a really long time since I've had such a small income. I'll be working in August as a student mentor, about ten hours per week. Just enough for spending money. The rest of my bills will be taken care of by financial aid, as well as all of my expenses for the month of July. I'm really not used to living on a budget quite so tight, but I am up to the challenge of doing everything as frugally as possible.

I'm challenging myself to spend as little as possible on things like clothes, shoes, and entertainment. Luckily for me, there's a fantastic Goodwill right in my neighborhood, I've got a fairly stocked closet as it is, and I'm usually pretty good at sniffing out the best sales and deals anyways.

 Okay, I'm really excited now.

~Megan

Happy Birthday, Self!

I'm 24 today! Cue the cake, friends, and bottles of wine to share with a view of the river.

But first, because I'm a firm believer in tradition, my birthday resolutions!

In my 24th year, I will:

• Enjoy more local, live theater. There is such a vibrant arts scene in Milwaukee, that it seems almost wrong not to enjoy it.
• Dance more. All kinds of dance. The kinds that I like to indulge in after a few too many martinis with the girls. The kinds that involve choreography. All of it.
• Brush up on my Mandarin Chinese and my French. Because, well, why not?
• Become more involved in my city. Volunteer, go to sweet parties, all of it. I love all of it and the more I get the opportunity to experience the more I want to do.
• Speaking of wine...I want to learn more about wine, wine making, and wine pairing. I can see many conversations with my friend Sean about grapes.

I can't wait to dive into another year! I'm going to start by diving into this delicious plate of sushi.

~Megan

Birthday Resolutions

I've never really been big on New Year's resolutions. I mean, its all well and good to say you're going to do such and such thing in the next year, especially when everyone else is also making self-promises.

But who really keeps up after say, the second week in January? I can definitely say not me.

Instead, I like to make Birthday Resolutions. Usually just a list of things I want to accomplish in the next chapter of my life. I've been pretty successful with them so far.

I'll show you what I mean. Here are last year's:

• Continue to get a grip on my financial life. I’ve made good progress so far, and I’m proud of me.
• Get down to my goal weight. I’ve lost 11 lbs this year so far, and I’ve got approximately 20-29 more to go. I’ll stop when I feel healthy again. Its definitely within reach and I’m so proud of the fact that I’m doing it the healthy way this time, instead of just, you know. Not eating.
• Get married! Not a huge resolution because that’s already happening, but its still a big milestone. My 24th birthday, I will have a different last name.
• Be a year closer to my degree. I’ve got about two years left, more if I add a second major. This time next year, I’ll be planning my senior year and maybe studying for the GRE.
• Leave the country for the first time ever.
• Maybe even leave the country alone. I want to see London, but I want to go by myself. It’s a good thing to put in the maybe pile.
• Continue to grow and mature as both a person and a writer.

I can honestly say I've done pretty well. I'm on top of the bills and finances in our household, and I'm nearly debt-free (excluding student loans. Yikes.)

As far as weight loss...I feel like this is something I'll constantly be struggling with. We're working on it.

Obviously, I'm married! Yay! Score another for Megan.

I'll be done with my degree by the end of next summer. I'm taking a giant course load, summer classes, and an interim course in order to finish ASAP. I'm so relieved and I can't wait to really bury my nose in some books.

I traveled to Costa Rica, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a summer study abroad program to Ireland. Score on both sides, if the program works out, since I'll obviously be doing that one on my own!

I know that last part is probably pretty vague. Honestly,  I feel as though I have grown immensely as a person in the last year. I mean, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. I really wish I could say physically because trying to explain to people that yes I'm only 4'11" and no I'm not a midget is really tiring on so many levels. I wouldn't mind an extra three inches in the height department, but I digress...

This blog is obviously a tool I'm using to continue building my writing skills. I'm enjoying every post, and I can only see myself going up from here.

Stay tuned for my next round of resolutions!

~Megan

Costa Rican Adventure

I'm back!

After spending the last week in sunny Costa Rica, I'm here in my fleece pajamas trying to get warm. I already miss it...

We stayed at the Riu Palace in Guanacaste. The sunny side of Costa Rica!

(The view from our balcony)

Of course, the first thing we did was hit the bar. After 3 hours of sleep (our shuttle picked us up at 3 am) and two flights, one involving a mad dash across the airport in Atlanta, we certainly needed a few fruity cocktails to relax. Thankfully, we found our new favorite bartender, whom we would have taken back to Milwaukee with us if we could have. He was pretty much magic when it came to making beach drinks involving layering:

All of those shots came from the same shaker. He just poured and each one came out a different color. 

Most of the vacation was spent with me reading in the room/on the balcony/by the pool. I finished four books, and started a fifth on the flight back. That's the most reading I've done possibly all year, and it felt amazing. I'm all caught up on one of my favorite paranormal romance/mystery series as well. (If you're into it, read The Hollows series by Kim Harrison. It's not over the top, I promise, it's just really, really good.)

We went into the rainforest and I made a new friend:

That's a female rhinoceros beetle. Very tickly. I almost dropped her.

I was even brave enough to go over the hanging bridges through the canopy. It was truly awe inspiring to be standing above the trees. 

(One of the observation points, not a bridge - no good pictures unfortunately)

We learned what rain in the rainforest is like...halfway through the hike it started pouring. Apparently I looked like a lemon ice pop in my (well, Andrew's) poncho, and the tour guide teased me for thinking it wouldn't rain in the rainforest.

Not pictured are the howler monkeys we saw on the way back to the airport, and the spider monkeys we saw in the forest. Andrew even saw a toucan!

I'm happy to be home, but I'm definitely missing Costa Rica.

~Megan

Unplugged

3 AM is a weird time in this city. People are slowly stumbling home from bars/parties, but it is very much a still and quiet time. I'm finding that I actually like it. I'm not usually awake for it.

But here I am, waiting for our shuttle to the airport. I'm packed and ready to go, stressing over what I may have forgotten, worrying about the cats and hoping I can fit my sun hat into my carry on.

I debated for a while about whether or not to bring my computer, as the resort gets free wifi, but I think part of this vacation is to be really disconnected from the internet. No phones, no computers, no late night emails or texts. Just the two of us and the ocean.

It's gonna be weird, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to it.

Moon is sitting here next to me purring away. Puck is asleep right next to her. Man, I'm gonna miss these cats. Especially Moon. It isn't often I get to spend this much time with her, because she isn't allowed in the bedroom and certainly not in the bed. She used to sleep with me every night, but the husband is allergic to her so she's relegated to the couch. Poor Moon.

Okay, internet. I'm leaving you alone for like, six days. Don't screw anything up, okay? See you when I get back!

~Megan

Warmed Up

I have really bad timing.

My honeymoon is in two days. Of course, my body picks now to come down with whatever Andrew had.

Body aches, sore throat, sneezing. It's hard to tell if I'm actually sick or the pollen count is super high.

Either way, I feel like death warmed up and just in time for my vacation.

I swear, this happens every time. Like when I got the stomach flu in Panama City right before we left for Disney World.

Maybe I'll feel better once I'm all packed. Fingers crossed!

~Megan

Into Darkness

It's no secret: I am a giant nerd. Really. 

Last night, Andrew took me to an early showing of Star Trek Into Darkness. 

I told him weeks ago that if we went, I'd dress up. I think he thought I was kidding.

I wasn't:

The only downside was that I was the only person dressed up at the theater we went to. A friend of ours who was at a different theater also dressed up, but still. At least everyone thought it was awesome. The best part? The whole outfit is made of things that were either already in my closet or less than $15. I picked up the red dress at H&M (I already have three others in the same style - I love them), and Andrew made my insignia (out of tinfoil), but the rest of it was stuff I already had. I felt super crafty!

The movie itself was amazing. I can't even begin to describe how well they did it. All the performances were spot on, and the effects were just crazy good. We're going to see it again once we're back from Costa Rica. 

Of course, that's not to mention that the cast is full of really attractive men. Benedict Cumberbatch, Christopher Pine, Zachary Quinto, John Cho. All my favorites in one place, and in Starfleet uniforms. What more could a (nerd) girl want?

~Megan

Reading Challenge (accepted)

Well, now that finals are (nearly) over, and I'm heading off on vacation, I'm in need of a new challenge.

A reading challenge.

Okay, so I know I'm taking summer courses and I won't have a ton of time to just sit and read for pleasure, but I feel like I need to read more (see upcoming birthday post. Spoilers...).

I decided, that instead of doing the Rory Gilmore reading challenge (which I will eventually do, but will ease into, because some of the books I know will take me longer than my own list), I made up my own.

The goal is one book per week. There's a good mix of literature, fiction, really popular fiction that I somehow haven't read yet (hunger games, etc), non-fiction, and biography. I'll try not to overload myself in one genre in order to keep things varied. I'm not sure where to start! 

What's good vacation reading? I don't want to start with The Fault In Our Stars and start sobbing on my honeymoon. I feel like the Hunger Games trilogy is too serious for the beach. Maybe the Song of Ice and Fire books? Again, too serious. Andrew will have a fit if I bring something non-fiction along on our "relaxing" honeymoon (I don't do relaxed, but that's a different post). I have the 10th and 11th books in the Hollows series by Kim Harrison (paranormal crime and romance, my guilty pleasure) on my nook. I'll probably start with those, since I need to catch up in the series. Then again, I also picked up The Official Preppy Handbook:

Okay, maybe this will be perfect to read on the beach. Lighthearted, funny-in-a-true-way, somewhat ethnographical (though not on purpose, I'm sure).

~Megan

Finals

Even though I'm only part time this semseter, finals are really getting to me.

Especially since I just got over the stress of the wedding, I'm preparing to leave the country on Sunday (!), and generally still moving in to my new apartment...I feel Daria says it best:





Okay, maybe not dead, but perhaps in a small coma.

(Also, I just spent about 30 minutes trying to figure out how to make those photos side-by-side without photoshop or proper access to picasa. Clearly, it was a fruitless 30 minutes.)

My head hurts, back to cramming.

~Megan

Mama's Day & OOTD

This is a day late but happy Mother's day!

Now that I'm married I have two moms to celebrate.

I had lunch with my mom on Saturday, and brunch with A's mom on Sunday in Lake Geneva.

The weather was unfortunately not as perfect as last year, but we still had a good time wandering around all the little shops.

And if I can toot my own  horn a little (and I'm allowed - this is my blog after all!), I looked pretty darn cute myself!

I've been on a huge yellow and navy kick lately. Granted, the weather wasn't quite good enough for bare legs and sandals, I couldn't resist.

I'm also trying to get the hang of taking selfies that don't include my face. I always just have this weird expression in photos. Anyways, that little black blur in the lower right corner is Puck. He really wanted to help me.

Which of course meant standing on the mirror's ledge and ruining quite a few pictures. But hey, he's too cute to be mad at, no?

Unfortunately, the weekend is over and now its time to cram for my astronomy final tonight. Wish me luck!

~Megan

Midweek Slump

It's Thursday and event though technically I'm a day late for "midweek", I'm still in a bit of a slump.

You know the one. Friday seems so far away and it still feels like a Monday.

No fun. 

In an effort to combat the blahs, I'm trying to remember the simple pleasures in life. Just the little things that can happen every day that make you feel all warm inside.

Like curling up with a good book. Or remembering tea and cake on your in-law's porch.

Yeah, that's crushed up Heath bar in the frosting. Who can be sad when you've got angel food cake with crushed up Heath bar and Fortnam & Mason tea?

At least it's almost Friday. 

~Megan

Tea Craving

I'm a die-hard coffee drinker. I can't function without a cup in the morning. Don't even try to talk to me before I've had my first cup - it won't be pretty.

In the afternoons though, I need just a touch less caffeine. Something a little softer and a little...complex. 

Enter my tea obsession. Samurai Chai from Teavana*.

I mean look at that. Spicy, sweet, a little earthy. I'm becoming a regular tea snob. It fits, because apparently I collect tea sets now. It happened totally on accident, I swear. I have a set from goodwill (minus the teapot), a set from Ikea (with a teapot Andrew brought back from London) and now a vintage set that I was given as a wedding present (including teapot). Oh, and a teapot from my bridal shower (which was tea party themed, complete with my grandmother's wedding china and fancy hats). And even though I have all of those, I can't help myself from lusting over this one:

Again, from Teavana. I just love the delicate shapes of the cups and the classic shape of the teapot.

Okay...maybe I have a problem. Maybe.

~Megan

*No, not sponsored, though I wouldn't mind if Teavana wanted to pay me to love their stuff.

Odd Conversations

Sometimes life with my (new) husband is a little...weird.

For example, we just had this coversation:

Me: "Armadillos can be housebroken. Can we have an armadillo?"

He looks at me and with the sweetest face: "Penguins can be nocturnal"

"That has nothing to do with getting a pet armadillo..."

"Oh, that was the point? I thought we were stating animal facts."

I mean, who wouldn't want one of these?

Awwww

I'd name it Jasper. Andrew says Tank. Or, inexplicably, Gweneth. 

Good thing you can't have an armadillo in Wisconsin...

~Megan

May The Fourth

May The Fourth Be With You.

Happy Star Wars Day!

~Megan

Challenge Accepted

I'm leaving for my honeymoon in 16 days.

That's just over two weeks. Woah.

So naturally, I decide to weigh myself because, hello, bikini time.

Maybe not the best plan because wow, I gained like 15 lbs. Aren't you supposed to lose weight before a wedding (you know, stress). That's what people keep telling me, but I guess it turns out I continue eating everything in sight even when I'm crazy stressed. Only instead of eating so many salads, I eat so many cupcakes. Yikes.

So my (self-imposed) challenge is to see how bikini-ready I can get before we leave.

Good-bye glasses of wine and boxes of Chinese takeout. Hello bottles of water and black bean soup.

Not that I'm complaining. Black bean soup is delicious. 

I do need to watch the froyo intake though. Well, more accurately the froyo topping intake.

Wish me luck! Because I'm shooting for this:

The bikini, not the model.

~Megan

Honeywine

The period of time after a couple marries is called a honeymoon because traditionally, the couple will spend a month (or a lunar cycle) together drinking mead, wine made with honey.

Also traditionally, the couple takes their honeymoon immediately after the wedding.

Unless you're me, and you schedule your wedding for two weeks before final exams.

Instead, I get to spend the next two weeks preparing for a trip to Costa Rica. I can't wait. There's going to be beaches, fruity drinks, wildlife, and a volcano. Yep, I get to go see a volcano. From the travel agent's email:

"Sit back and enjoy a scenic ride from Guanacaste to Arenal where you will begin you adventure passing through dry forest and transition into a rain forest. A short walk will introduce you to the interactions of the rain forest. Head to a safe viewing area to experience the thundering volcano – one of the most active in the Western Hemisphere. Learn about the geological complexity of the 5,000-foot (1,524-meter) giant as you take in the views of Guanacaste's green hillsides. The Arenal Volcano has been active since 1968, and to this day continues to produce a daily mixture of glowing red lava and explosions. Feel the earth rumbling as the sky explodes with nature's own fireworks. Take a short hike in one of the trails close to the volcano and enjoy some forest and the activity around it. You'll learn about this unique ecosystem of Costa Rica, a country that includes six percent of the world's biodiversity. After your hike, it's time to relax and enjoy a complimentary lunch. Then rejuvenate yourself with a healthy and relaxing soak in a mineral pool and hot spring created by the volcano itself. At night enjoy a delicious dinner while you await the most spectacular volcano's night show before heading back to Guanacaste." 

Okay, I know that's super long to read, but seriously, doesn't that sound amazing? I haven't had the opportunity to leave the country yet, so on my first trip abroad I get to see an active volcano.

Now to plan my outfits...

~Megan